Saturday, March 10, 2012

A Tool for the Toolbox

I'm learning to let go of much of what eats me up inside. The swarming flies and gnats will always be bothersome, but I only have so much time to give them attention and shoe them away before I finally wise up and relocate. 99% of people are best described as cunts. It is true, and 99% of "The 1%" are included in this number. That still leaves about 70 million cool, generally good-natured, and sound-minded human beings. I could be wrong. The number could be as much as 100 million or even as great as 1/7th of the world's population. At the very least, 85% of the world's population equals a lot of cunts. I will not venture here to determine which side of the coin that my face is imprinted upon. When I say that I have learned I am being somewhat misleading. I'm not so sure that I have learned anything in this department outside of a jaded perspective of general population and a strict judgement of character. The neo-tribal mentality prevails. I stick to my clan, and networking is merely a means for financial gain. The series of disappointments that have led me to the fork in the road and my decided upon path seems to have merely generated an apathy as oppose to learning. I simply no longer care, do not have time, and am down right fed up with my time being wasted with bullshit promises and people. I do not welcome the world of man with open arms. It may appear to be cold and cynical, but that is not the issue. My love and warmth have only grown under the light of shutting my blinds to generally deceptive, self-centered, and otherwise toxic people who seek to rob me of precious integrity, time, energy, and just about anything they can get their hands on.

I am "sick and tired of being sick and tired" of worrying about the general conception of who and what I am. I know who I am, and the subject does not arose confusion of those who are truly important and know me. There may be gaps within the story or even the perspective, but who gives a shit? All I ask is that the general outline not be confused. I am privileged to have some in my life with exacting definitions. Those who can only examine the minute details that take away from the big picture of me are only doing so because I scare the shit out of them. While that statement sounds ego-maniacal, I am only presenting an analysis and factoring of life long observation and outcomes. The fact is, these people should be scared; they hide their motives, make attempts to "torch the truth", and bask in self-aggrandizing mediocrity. I seek to expose myself and them.

I am a father, a husband, a filmmaker, a musician, a business man, an artist, a writer, a punk, and a list of many other titles that deserve mention but have stylistically been omitted. There is nothing that even the world imploding upon itself can do about it. I am what I am and always will be. I have deviated from a quality over quantity policy, and must now bring the two together in harmony.

Accomplishments should not be measured by the amount of attention that is given to them by the outside world. How an individual measures their own accomplishments and successes is how an individual's accomplishments are measured within the spectrum of cosmic truth. I do not need to get a single hit on this entry. I need to write it and submit my assignment it to the ether, the spirits, the gods of 0s and 1s, or whatever. I need to artistically satiate myself, and maybe somewhere along the way someone will either relate or talk some shit. This is merely an added bonus.

I have run out of time. I will summarize with three words, and they will simplify this entire entry making it seem somewhat "wordy." Feel free to use them as a tool for your own use in life. When appropriately used they can give the wordsmith power and liberty. Attempts should be made to not water their substance down with overuse. However, I'm sure that they are suited for many situations and circumstances. I hope you find them useful. If not, well...

Go Fuck Yourself.

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